You know what I’m talking about.
The attractive celebrity or social media influencer with the perfect-looking life sharing their latest “easy tip” for success.
Let’s be real. If someone with an over-inflated ego is sharing their “easy tip” for success – it’s probably not gonna work for you.
The more you think about it, the worse it feels. The more you try to change your behavior to meet these expectations and standards (however arbitrarily set), the more stressed and frustrated you become.
Personal development is all about you growing, enriching and developing yourself. It's your personal journey of self-discovery, exploration and experimentation in order to become more well rounded and more in tune with who you really are.
Personal development is just that - personal. We must begin placing greater emphasis on personalizing our growth and self work.
3 Tips to Personalize Your Growth
Take what resonates and leave the rest
When it comes to advice and finding your own path, there are so many ways to view the world. Take what resonates and leave the rest. You’re on your way to finding your own truths.
2. There’s no one size fits all solution
What works for your favorite celebrity or best friend might not work for you. Keep trying new things until you land on what lights you up. Maybe you’d rather make a mental list of your gratitudes instead of writing them in a journal each day. Great - it still counts, even if it’s not how someone else does it.
3. Consider your unique circumstances
Ask yourself if you have the time and energy to commit to the daily practice at this time in your life.
I always encourage my clients to do what you can, when you can, for the season of life you’re in and the resources you have available. Sleep-deprived new parents shouldn’t be trying to wake up extra early to journal, for example. Lean into the constraints and remember they’re usually temporary.
Personal Development Isn’t Always Appropriate
In a culture that encourages us to go-go-go and do-do-do, it can be hard to know when to do the opposite. Personal development doesn’t have to be an all-consuming part of your everyday life — and it doesn’t need to come at the expense of other areas of your well-being. If you find yourself in a season of survival mode or burnout, work on taking care of your basic needs before turning any more energy towards new skills.
It’s a Journey
Perhaps the hardest truth to accept is that you will never “arrive.” You will make remarkable progress and very likely come to enjoy the process, yes. And, life will continue to change, delivering new challenges and transitions.
The effects of growth typically happen in the rear-view mirror, much like the impact of epic travel and other immersive experiences. We don’t always recognize it in the moment. It’s months, even years, down the road when you realize you’re doing things differently.
Consider permission to create your own path, on your own terms, granted.